Stress of moving

The stress of the move is getting to me, and I am not holding up to it very well today I am afraid. I have spent part of the day in tears, and the other part wanting to curl up in a corner and go to sleep.
First of all Jerry went up to Georgia yesterday to get checked in today. The past 6 months have not been kind to us finacially, between paying for Jerry's hotel room in Biloxi out of pocket, and my not having a teaching job this fall. We are quite frankly broke, heck we are beyond broke at this point. Which means he went north in the Prius on about a hundred bucks, and has to come home on that as well, and I had about the same to work with this week.

We are behind on every bill except the cars, the mortgage, and the insurance, and that is because those are all on automatic allotment with the military. Jerry went in and met with his first sargent as soon as he could today and told him everything that has happened to us, and where we are at money wise, because we are on the verge of him getting in trouble with the Air Force, even though they caused the problem. The way they look at it is that we should have been more prepared for the issue, and we were to an extent, but not to the 6 month extent. The first shirt was very nice and understanding, and is trying to help us as much as he can with helping Jerry find a house, and all that he can do on that end.

I went today and filled out the paperwork to be taken off the sub roles for the district, which seems funny to say since I haven't subbed in over a month. Admittedly that is because I have been working 30+ hour weeks at Lowes, with most of those hours during the week, but that was a definate. I could have changed my availablity to being available at night but that would mean giving up teaching online, which again isnt a promised number of hours a week.

I also went today and filled out the paperwork for the girls last days to be Thursday. At both schools I was told how much they were going to be missed, and what great kids they are, which we already knew, but it was nice to hear. (Of course this weekend I was willing to give Kelsey away, because she was having a teenage moment over the move).

When I was at the high school I was given some advice by one of the administrators. He said that I need to go up to Georgia and get on the sub list, then work every day that they call me for, and days that I am not working go in and volunteer at the girl's schools. He said that is the best way to get myself known at the schools, and that he knows I am a hard worker, because I proved it the days I subbed there, so I just need to prove it to the admins in Georgia. Which I know already, but I needed to hear it again to remind me that if I want to stay teaching I have to do something to make sure that I get offered a job for next fall. In order to do that I have to get my face and name known, and working full time at Lowes, or online is not going to accomplish that. Jerry's first shirt also told Jerry that he didn't think I would have a problem getting a job for the fall if I get out there and sub as soon as I can up there.

The only problem with this logic is that it isn't promised money coming in. Which means falling even further behind. So I am not sure that we can do it, especially since we will still have the mortgage here, and rent there, plus if I am working days we will have to pay for preschool/daycare for DJ. Which is why I went back to work at Lowes, because I had to have something to pay for preschool. Its a never ending battle.

Christmas this year is going to be small, which is fine with the move and really the kids don't need a big Christmas, but most definately makes me feel like a grinch or scrooge. I went to the Dollar Tree today and was able to get some small things for the kids to fill in the "gaps", there are still big holes, but at least they will be ok with what there is there.