My friend and co-worker M's girl friend that is.
M and his girl friend have a 1 year old little boy, who has special needs. I am not sure of all of his needs, but I know that they are pretty intense.
He is the sweetest most cuddly little guy though. Every time M brings him into work with him and I am there he curls up in my arms and gives me the best cuddles.
M says he doesn't do that with just anyone, and he definately doesn't do it with a lot of the others at work.
But M's girl friend does not know how lucky she is.
From what I can see, M is there for her and the baby every step of the way. He goes to all of the baby's therapy appointments, and doctor's appointments as long as he is off of work or does not have a class (M is in college). Everything M does is for that baby and that girl.
M has not done what a typical guy in his situation would have done, which is cut out and run. And his family has been super supportive with the situation as well. They babysit for the baby when both the kids have to work, and just when M's girl friend needs a break.
M asked me for advice last night at work. His family has planned their first family vacation in a few years, and have invited his girl friend and the baby to go along. They really want the baby there, and from the sounds of it the girl friend as well.
M's girl friend had planned to go, but then scheduled therapy appointments for when she knew they would be gone, and "forgot" to ask for the days off of work, so she is scheduled to work.
M is upset because now the girl friend wants/expects him to cut his vacation short and drive her back home half way through the vacation.
M's parents are ticked because they have planned and arranged things around having the baby with them, gladly from the sounds of it, and she is throwing a wrench in the plans. Plus if she/the baby doesn't go, she will have to find other care for the baby while she is at work.
M asked me what I thought about the baby missing his therapy.
My question was have you been to enough of his therapy sessions, both speech and physical that you think you could do the exercises with him while you are gone? And do you think that the therapists would give you a list of things to work on with him if you called them?
His answer to both questions was yes, and that he and his family already do the at home exercises with the baby. So he was going to call both therapists today to see about rescheduling the appointments and getting exercises that he could do with the baby while they were gone.
I told him that he should talk to his girlfriend again and explain to her how important it is to him that they go, and that if she is worried about missing work, then letting the baby go, or stay while she is at home. (He keeps the baby over night without her several times a month.)
I hope it all works out for the baby to go with them.
I wish there was a way to show her how lucky she has it with M as that baby's father, and M's family as that baby's family.
I think about M and the baby daily, because I know they both need the strength.